Did I Ever Tell You How Much I Hate Tivo?

8 Sep

I mean…did I? I’m sure I did. Read back a few posts. Catch up, then come back.

[waiting………]

Did you catch up? Can you see why I’m upset?

So here’s an update.

I got a temporary credit from my bank while they investigated my dispute. YAY ME! The bank said that they would send me some paperwork. I would fill in the required information, sign it, and fax it back. No problemo chief!

After another call to TIVO, because I still had not received the mailing label to return the unwanted DVR, I waited another week. Finally, after 2 long months, I received not ONE, but TWO mailing labels from the TIVO returns department. [smh] I promptly slapped the label on the DVR which was still in the original box and dropped it at the FedEx-Kinkos.

Meanwhile, I realized I still hadn’t received the paperwork from the bank, so I called them.

Conversation below (after giving bank acct #, social security #, pin number, mailing address, phone #, IQ Scores, bra size and giving the exact amount of dents in my beat-down dresser):

Insane Bank Worker Lady: Hello, bank work lady. How can I help you?

Sexy me: Yes. I disputed a charge on my account a few weeks ago and received a temporary credit. I was told I would receive paperwork requiring my signature in the mail, but I haven’t received anything.

Insane Bank Worker Lady: Ohhhhh. Really? Let me look at your account.

[holding until the cows come home]

[cows pull up to house]

[make out in car]

*tapping foot*

[make out some more]

[cows finally exit the car with skin on inside out]

[stumble into the house]

Insane Bank Worker Lady: OK Ms. Ro, I have your information up. Now, what did you say?

Sexy me: [sigh] I said that I disputed a charge on my account a few weeks ago, but haven’t received the required paperwork in the mail.

Insane Bank Worker Lady: Ahhh…yes. Ok. Um. Yes. See. You really don’t need that paperwork.

Sexy me: Erm… I don’t? [sorta doubtful – I’ve had my share of dumb phone answerers]

Insane Bank Worker Lady: Oh no ma’am. You don’t. [sounding convincing] We only require that paperwork if there has been a problem with the investigation. Looking at your account, I see that everything is going along just fine! We don’t need any additional information.

Sexy me: Are you sure? I could have sworn….

Insane Bank Worker Lady: I’m positive ma’am. You are just fine!

Sexy me: Well, if you say so. [slap dumb sticker on me now]

So, I felt better. The box went back, I got my money. Things were good. I didn’t even curse TIVO when I turned her on anymore.

Then….then….thennnnnnn…..Monday. The holiday! Labor day! The day I sat on my ass and counted how many times I could blink in 60 seconds without getting dizzy or passing out (280)…My day of nothingness. I decided to login to my bank account because I am a bit OC. I login a few times a day to make sure the numbers in the columns are straight and to make sure my address is still the same. And what do you know….?! My account..she was almost 300 bucks lower than it was the last time I checked the straightness of the columns. Did I go shopping? [scratches head] Then I saw it — TIVO CHARGE BACK!! Gahhh! I called my banks 1-800 number right away (the credit card dispute department)…and don’t you know they were open. [shrug] Apparently, I did need that stupid paperwork. Luckily I was able to give them all needed info over the phone (why I couldn’t do that in the first place…I dunno). It was going to take a few days for me to get my loot back. I’m poor! I ain’t got a few days!! So, TIVO had it’s stupid DVR and my money. WTF?

I logged in this morning to make sure I still had my .94 cents in my savings account and noticed my 300 bucks was back. TIVO is one lucky bastard. I was gonna use that extra mailing label to mail them a good ol’ fashioned ass-whuppin.

🙂

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